Writings

10 Reasons Why Adulting Is Hard

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I just have a few words for today. Those words: Adulting is hard.

2018 so far has been…hard. There are just no other words to describe it. Whether it’s sickness, general overwhelm, other people, my darn feet…adulting is hard. I won’t say anything has been bad per se, but hard is probably just the best adjective for it.

As I quickly approach 31 (a.k.a. my birthday is Sunday), I’m laughing/lamenting/groaning about how adulting is hard. It’s funny to me that as kids & teenagers, we LONG to be adults. Then, when we get “here,” we realize that adulting isn’t all it’s cracked up to be and that no one really knows what is happening.

I was practically an adult child. Independent to a fault, always knowing what I wanted, and figuring out how to get things I wanted with or without the help of others. I’ve been pretty “adult-y” ever since I can remember – example: Hello, solo apartment lease in Chicago as soon as I turned 18. That confidence and resilience have served me pretty well, so I think it all worked out for the best. Needless to say, I probably kept the adults in my life on their toes. #SorryNotSorry. Now, I’m just feeling pretty meh about this whole adulting thing. Everything is FAR more complicated than it should be – especially making friends! When you’re all off doing your thing, it’s hard to make friends as an adult. There are resources out there if you’re looking for some guidance on making & maintaining friendships as an adult.

All that to say, for your entertainment, here are my 10 Reasons Why Adulting is Hard!

We have to do all that “stupid stuff.”
What is this stupid stuff? Clean, do our laundry, take out the trash, do the dishes, make the bed, etc. Or you don’t have to, but then you just have to deal with being the messy barbarian that you are or pay for someone to come handle it for you.

We have to deal with broken things.
Oops, the dishwasher broke or oops, Susie crashed the car. Things break or have to be maintained. You pay an obscene amount of money for something only to see it need a costly repair just a few months later or it spontaneously explodes and you have to replace it completely. Cars, clothing, electronics, CELL PHONES — it all adds up.

Everything Costs So Much Money
I’m not even going to sugarcoat it. Everything is far more expensive than it should be. As a business owner myself, I still think everything costs too much. Why are utilities so expensive…especially when I live alone and never turn on the heat or a/c?!? Bills? Bills are for the birds.

Free time? What’s that?
In those few precious hours that we’re away from work or other income-producing activities, you somehow expect me to do the following:
-Sleep, shower, eat
-Workout
-See friends
-Read books
-Pursue hobbies
-Keep my living environment somewhat livable
-etc. etc. etc.
There aren’t enough hours in the day. They somehow disappeared between high school and here.

Scheduling is Dumb
This part of adulting is the worst. Everyone juggles 500 plates, so scheduling things is always hairy. Getting together with friends and family is always harder when adulting, especially when there is travel involved. Why don’t all of my friends live around the corner or down the hall anymore?!? This also includes trying to schedule a doctor or dentist’s appointment…for the love of God, just put it all online so we can see our options and then pick what works best. The whole getting on the phone to call and wait on hold is something that has to be “scheduled” — ain’t nobody got time for that.

Saying No
I get that “saying no” is a big part of self-care and general responsibility, especially if you’re raising tiny humans. No is one of my favorite words. However, thanks to pesky “life responsibilities,” you often find yourself saying no to things that would really make you happy and that’s always rough.

2018: What a Time to Be Alive
Different challenges exist now when it comes to adulting. Being an adult 20 years ago is entirely different than being an adult now. Yes, some challenges remain the same, but as a whole, things are very different.

People Really Like to Tell You What to Do
I thought that stopped when we mysteriously became adults. Guess not. I even find myself doing this sometimes, but it’s something I’m trying to keep in check.

Timelines!
When you were growing up, timelines were the norm. Turn 5, then go to Kindergarten, then elementary school, to junior high, then high school. And then after that, you probably went to a college of some sort. It’s just the timeline we all subscribed to. After those landmarks…what’s the next timeline? Which leads me to…

Expectations
There’s some mysterious expectational “thing” out in the ether that seems to insist that once you’re an adult of a certain age that you must have everything together and just so-so. HA! No one has it all together 24/7, no matter how much they appear to on social media. Everyone hits their stride at different times, people start relationships and families at different times – and that’s OK! That’s normal! We’re all just figuring it out as we go.

I could probably come up with about 10 more reasons why adulting is hard, but I have coffee to drink and avocado toast to be made. So…happy Friday!

What do you think about adulting? Favorite or least favorite part?

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10 Comments

  • Natalie

    Amen! I wish adulting was as hard as I thought it would be; that would be a vacation!

    April 23, 2018 at 3:11 pm Reply
    • Kelsee

      If only we knew “then” what we know “now!” Thanks for swinging by!

      April 23, 2018 at 3:12 pm Reply
  • Jennifer

    Thanks for keeping it real! I feel like with social media, it’s easy to create the illusion that everything is going well, when in reality, adulting is just HARD. Great post!

    April 23, 2018 at 4:15 pm Reply
    • Kelsee

      Thanks for stopping by! Sometimes, you just have to lay it all out on the table!

      April 23, 2018 at 4:16 pm Reply
  • Megan

    Yes! I love this post. People always say “It’s okay to say no”, but I feel like adulting means saying no to the things that are more enjoyable / less responsible and saying yes to the things I “should be” saying yes to (according to some unspoken, responsible adult rules)! Thanks for sharing this!

    April 23, 2018 at 5:27 pm Reply
    • Kelsee

      Thanks for swinging by! 🙂

      April 23, 2018 at 5:43 pm Reply
  • Denise Riehle

    Today was a rough “adulting” day for me, so this headline and article really caught my interest. Thank you so much!

    April 24, 2018 at 1:01 am Reply
    • Kelsee

      Thanks for coming by!

      April 24, 2018 at 1:59 am Reply
  • Alecia

    Yes! Adulting is hard af!

    April 24, 2018 at 3:17 am Reply
  • Kayla Sloan

    That pretty much sums it up! It’s too bad we don’t start out at 18 knowing what we do several years later. I guess that’s a part of the journey.

    May 4, 2018 at 2:07 pm Reply
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